Just-My-Dreamland

raptorific:

I hit words at random on iOS 8’s new predictive text feature so I could see what type of sentence my phone thinks I’m likely to say, and

image

(via sniffing)

percypan:

THIS GUY JUST ASKED ME WHAT MY NAME WAS AND I DIDNT UNDERSTAND WHAT HE SAID SO I SAID 4:45

(via sniffing)

naomicampbelle:

when your parents try to give you fashion adviceimage

(via obsurd)

ryanbeford:

Me: I’m so ugly!

500 million other people: NONONO U ARE SO CUTE AND SWEET U ARENT UGLY DONT U EVER SAY THAT!!!!

Me: wow I’m really beautiful!

500 other million people: WOW YOU’RE SO SELF CENTERED. CAN YOU KEEP THAT TO YOURSELF???? NO ONE CARES.

(via obsurd)

clitpotle:

her face is saying “worth it.”

clitpotle:

her face is saying “worth it.”

(Source: everytimeidiabetes, via obsurd)

unblushes:

Want to be promoted to 50,000+ dashboards?

Like= 50% chance

Reblog = 75% chance

Reblog & Like = 90% chance

MUST FOLLOW ALL BLOGS BELOW:

We know you’re thinking “OMG, that’s too many blogs to follow!”, but I promise once you start gaining - it will be worth it! Please do not try to be sneaky & not follow us all because we DO check. We ALWAYS do our promos!

The more honest you are, the more people we promote!

******* message ashley for a better chance ********

theladypipsqueak:

salparadisewasright:

theladypipsqueak:

MY MOM DECIDED THAT SINCE I FUCKING HATE CLEANING THE LITTERBOX FOR MY DUMB CATS SHE’S ACTUALLY MAKE ME A FUCKING LITTERBOX CAKE. THIS IS A FUCKING CAKE. THOSE ARE SLIGHTLY MELTED TOOTSIE ROLLS. THOSE ARE LOTS OF COOKIE CRUMBLES. BUT IT LOOKS FUCKING REAL. I ATE THIS IN A RESTAURANT. I RECIEVED WORRIED STARES FROM OTHER PATRONS AS I FEASTED UPON FUCKING CAT POOP. MY BABY SISTER REFUSED TO LET ME EAT THE TOOTSIE ROLLS BECAUSE SHE WAS ONE HUNDRED PERCENT CONVINCED IT WAS POOP, SHE RIPPED IT OUT OF MY HANDS AND THREW IT BACK IT THE PAN.

"SISSY!" SOMEONE WAS LOOKING ON HORRIFIED AS SHE GRABBED THE DISTURBING LOOKING CANDY OUT OF MY HAND. "DONT EAT POOP SISSY!"

a li tter box cae k„

congratulations on turning 91

thanks

(Source: thesmuttypirate, via sniffing)